Passing-Thought

dreams and loss of control

I rarely have nightmares. But I have noticed in recent years that I have re-occurring dream incidents related to the theme of "losing control". One such incident is losing control of my car, usually not being able to brake. I suppose this could become a nightmare if I suddenly needed to brake on the highway when traveling at a high speed. But this has never been the case. Usually, I am driving in the neighborhood and slowing to park. At that point my car keeps gliding until it hits something. My typical reaction in the dream is to try to calm myself about it, perhaps guessing the damage was not that significant or to assure myself it is just a dream.

In another use of "transportation" as symbolic vehicle, I've had more than one dream where I'm in an airport and I'm not quite sure where I am supposed to go, or how to get there. A sense of being lost, having no sense direction.

Other dreams involve the incident of suddenly remembering some big responsibility that I had forgotten. A common occurrence of this is being in school (usually college) during finals week, and suddenly remembering some class that I had somehow managed to forget to attend the entire semester! Dreadful experience. Along the same lines, I've had the same experience pertaining to working at Sonic Drive-In (where I cooked hamburgers and fries for 5 years through high-school and college). Suddenly, I remember that I'm supposed to work this weekend, and must have forgotten to show up for several weekends. How would I explain myself?

Sometimes I find myself walking into a gymnasium and discovering my name upon some wrestling tournament bracket. I think, "There must be some mistake! I thought I was finished with all this!" Yet, it never seems to dawn on me to ignore the event altogether. So, I typically end up wrestling again.

There are a few dreams where I get so worked up over something I scream at someone close to me (eg. a relative). The feeling of anger is consuming. For people who know me, such outbursts are quite out of character for me. I hardly ever get angry. Irritated and frustrated sometimes, but never outright outrage.

It's hard for me to believe that such reoccuring dreams are simply pointless and random. No doubt they stem from suppressed anxieties during a particular season in my life, or some disharmony in a relationship that I should deal with.