"I would never make it as an actor: I have a hard enough time being myself!" ;-)
-- But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires. Romans 13:14
I have a seminary final exam on Tuesday 13th, Introduction to Systematic Theology, taught by Dr. Sinclair Ferguson. Appreciate prayers! Yeah, it's true, I've been taking classes for almost 5 years now, and I'm finally taking Intro ST 101. (To my credit, I did audit the class under Dr. Gaffin a few years ago.) Well, even Dr. Ferguson says it really should be one of the last courses one takes (i.e. our thoughts about how to approach the subject matter should be determined by our knowledge of the subject matter). After this class, I estimate having about 11 hours remaining in an MAR in Biblical Studies. But I still need to officially enroll in that program. :) Now that I have a full time job, limited funds, and still looking for a future wife....I should finish the degree before I turn 40. :) Actually, I'm ready to be finished with my classwork. Every year, I feel less and less like a student there. Almost all of my fellow classmates have graduated who started with me. And since I only have time and money to take one class per semester, I don't feel like I'm around the other students enough to get to know them. I do enjoy the classes. Dr. Ferguson is a very refreshing professor. When I leave class, my brain hurts, but my heart is warmed from the gospel.
I must have "Family Trees" too much on the brain. Now I'm beginning to think the basic connecting principle of the entire Bible is genealogically driven.
Canonically speaking, the Old and New Testaments are sutured together by this divine-anthropological schema:
The book of the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah, son of Abraham, son of David... Thus, Matthew titles his Gospel. The gospel is genealogical; in a sense, the gospel is a covenant genealogy:
A) from paternal promise (in Abraham),
B) to royal investiture (in David),
B') to exilic divestiture (in Babylon),
A') to resurrection maternal fulfillment (in Mary).
Life to honor, honor to shame, guilt to justification.
The King James preserves the thrust of this action better than other contemporary translations, employing the masculine active verb form for fatherhood: "to beget". Abraham begat Isaac, Isaac begat Jacob, Jacob begat Judah...: in this manner, the begetting rushes forth, descending like the current of a mighty waterfall. But there are a number of rocks along the way down, disturbences in downward flow: whenever women are mentioned, the action pauses, until finally the volumous water empties into a crashing silence...like a symphony that ends its crescendo short one note, with the conductor bowing in its place. The active series of begettings stop with Joseph: "begat, begat, begat...Joseph husband of Mary by whom was born Jesus" Thus, paternal activity gives way to passive maternity, or in other words, genealogy gives way to gynecology.
What a wussy way to end a royal, patriarchal genealogy! Not to mention embarrasingly scandelous. "Some Messiah you are. Do you belong to the line of David or not? If Joseph is not the father, then whose bastard child are you?" Matthew's subsequent narrative begins to adjudicate the criticism his own genealogy invites. Jesus is "born of the virgin Mary" because God, not Joseph, is his father, from beginning to end. And that relationship necessitates that the son will bear forth a life of truth bearing false accusations, so that "through my lie, God's truth might abound to His glory" (Rom 3:7). That is what is meant in the beginning of the gospel in Genesis, when God declares to the serpent, "he [the seed of the woman] shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel." The cross of the Messiah is where the truthfulness of God meets the head of Satan. Thus, the embarrassing genealogy (gynecology) of Jesus needs no apology, it is sufficient defense that the Messiah, is truly Messiah; the son of God, his only begotten. The genealogy is not simply descriptive history, it is a theological legacy preaching the shape of obedience that God requires of his son; a call to faithful obedience unto death with the hope of resurrection.
You now, who have been baptized into the Messiah, born of the Church by His Spirit and Word, descendents of the Family Tree of his Father, bear forth the crest our questionable origins. We carry the same scandelous image of truth to an unbelieving world, full of lies and deceivers. Take courage, "the God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you."
I spent Thanksgiving with my two great aunts, whom I haven't seen since I was a little boy. They are twin sisters to my grandfather Pyle who died before I was born. I asked them to tell me more about my family history from my father's side of the family. And I received the beginnings of a family tree and some stories to hang on that tree as Christmas ornaments.
My father was divorced when I was seven years old, and my mother sought to establish our family upon healthier grounds and to form new memories. Now that I'm older and hoping to start my own family, I feel an instinctual need to reach back into my past, to be rooted genealogically speaking, to recover and rehearse memories of my childhood, and stories received from my ancestors. Forming my own family means much more than just passing on my genes, it means sharing my personal identity, which has a historical family context, a lineage. I have no desire to pass on my family history as a means to justify the philosophy that "blood is thicker than water". That is idolatry and perversion of truth. But to trace God's providential hand, to discover when and in what manner our proximate family lived in Egypt so that we can better appreciate the benefits of our Exodus in Christ and our future hope to enter The Promised Land.
In many ways, the very existence of my blog "Passing-Thought" is connected to this basic (paternal) desire to "pass on" with the existential conviction that all present human thought passes away, as its time confronts eternity. Thus, the title captures "what blogging means to me." "Passing-Thought" is in the singular rather than plural. The blog is thematically holistic in conception, and has its conviction of sticking to its own meaning and reason for existence. It has an organizing principle, even if that principle be the flux process bearing my surname, rather than a pre-determined cloned product. It is a play on words carrying four basic senses:
"Passing-Thought"
1) Each entry represents a time-bound action, in full fleeting glory. A thought delivered from the womb of my mind unto the cradle of the webpage, carrying its own birth-certificate. A blog is chronology of such thought beggetings, each carrying within their cell-structure my psychogenetic DNA.
2) The fixation of such thoughts into public writing is at the same time a means to reach out beyond their time of deliverance, beyond the cradle of the entry, into the hands of those who want to share and remember the experience, perhaps to see something in its face that reminds them of their own time-boundness, origins, age, and inevitability. So, not just a passing of thought from mind to page, but from paged-thought to another's thought.
3) The allowance of blog comments is a means to receive feedback, as from a babysitter, to learn about their time spent with my children, whether they were ill-behaved or give reason to be proud. And to be willing to return the babysitting favor. Thus, in this sense "Passing-Thought" represents an exchange of ideas, an interpersonal give and take.
4) "All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls, but the word of the Lord remains forever." In the ultimate sense, "Passing-Thought" is a confession that all human thought must bow to eternity before the thrice Holy God, when he comes to judge the world in glory. Every thought expressed must seek to pass away, self-sacrificially, otherwise there is no hope to pass on. Not even through their children or children's children. Every word must wear the the attitude "I am nothing, I know nothing" as its logo, in respect to the One in whom is all knowledge.
God said to Adam, "Cultivate and keep the garden."
Blogging as a "genealogical" exercise, in its highest (unselfish) form, is an act of love towards others. In the first sense, it tries to accept that God has given my thoughts, not just for my own use, but in practical service to others, for His glory. It forces me to speak when my perfectionistic tendency is to not to speak until my thought is "perfect". But my thoughts are never perfect, they are always under construction, subject to God's maturing sanctifying work of grace. My task is to plant and water, in the sound hope that God gives growth.
Consequently, the bearing forth of thoughts as children, requires responsibility. I must accept my children as my own, and be willing to accept how they affect the lives of others (and their children); When they misbehave, apologize for not always raising them as I should, in the nurture and admonition of my own Father. When they do well, admit that whatever good I pass on, comes only from my Father.
God said, "It is not good for Adam to be alone."
Blogging as "genealogical" exercise, requires more than self. As stewards of God's creation in His image, man was designed to need female to accomplish his garden task, to bring all things into the fulness of the glory of God. Likewise, if no one listens, I write in vain. If no one responds, I think in vain.